"Hello, yes, it’s very nice to meet you, too, I’m LAWYER."
"Ok, so, you were approved for a loan modification? Great! So legally the bank can no longer foreclose on you. Oh? You are still being foreclosed on? I’m very sorry to hear that."
"How long has this been going on? And you received $500 as a part of the @USOCC settlement with the banks?”
"Well, you can still pursue legal action. Next steps? Well, I’m afraid our one hour is up. If you’d like to continue, we’ll need to schedule another meeting. And yes, my rate is $500/hour, so if you need to set up a payment plan we can definitely help you with that…"
Yes, maligned homeowner, one of the megabanks screwed you. You had a loan modification request APPROVED, and yet you were STILL foreclosed on. The banks fucked up, what can we say?
You know, it was probably Wells Fargo, who had up to an 80% error rate in foreclosure files reviewed, as reported on by the WSJ last year: “Ms. Cordova, who trained contract workers on a review of Wells Fargo files in Orange, Calif., said the rate of errors on files she saw was rising when banks and regulators halted the exams. Certain batches produced error rates as high as 45% to 80% in late 2012, she added.”
But don’t worry! The @USOCC has a solution! They’re gonna make the banks pay you between $300 and $500!
THINK OF ALL THE BOOZE YOU CAN BUY WITH THAT MONEY!?
Who needs a house when you can drown your sorrows with drink?!
A homeowner who had a loan mod APPROVED, but was STILL FORECLOSED on gets $300-500. You may have lost your home, but don’t worry, you can still buy this nice dollhouse (if you borrow $5 extra bucks that is)!
You can buy a 32GB iPhone 5 if you are a homeowners who had a loan modification APPROVED, but are STILL BEING FORECLOSED ON because the banks do not have their shit together (one dept handles loan mods, another handles foreclosures; this is called “dual-tracking”)! Congratulations! It only took the pain and suffering of a foreclosure fight that wasn’t your fault to get the $ for your new phone! Enjoy!